The Conflict Expert

Successfully resolving conflict means reaching durable solutions which both parties agree to accept and adhere to. The way you go about doing that will depend on the type of conflict and the unique circumstances that pertain to it. S

Conflict Resolution Styles

It is important to consider your style when thinking about the outcome you want.

According to M. Afzalur Rahim,[1] there are five distinct styles:

1. Compromising – both parties make concessions to reach a consensus;
2. Avoiding– the intentional act of ignoring a conflict;
3. Dominating – over-powering the other side with your decision-making or position;
4. Obliging – accommodating the needs and interests of the other parties; and
5. Integrating – finding a creative solution to the conflict which aims to satisfy the interests of both parties which is possible because both see the conflict as a mutual problem which needs to be resolved collaboratively.

When are they appropriate?

Compromising	Avoiding	Dominating	Obliging	Integrating
Parties are equally powerful	The conflict has been highly emotive and you both need to cool off.	Issue is not complex or important	The relationship is important to you	The parties have time to discuss
The parties’ goals are totally unlinked	The outcome is not important to you	It’s about asserting leadership over subordinates lacking authority or expertise	Your position is weak	The matter is complex
The parties are at a stalemate	Confrontation could only make things worse	Conceding to the other party may be expensive for you	The issue is not important to you	Both parties trust each other and can collaborate
None of the other styles are appropriate and a temporary solution is needed to move on.	The other side’s position is so weak, engaging in any way will simply waste resources	A speedy decision is necessary, possibly to avoid further conflict.	Conceding now could lead to a better position in the future i.e. “choose your battles”	Both parties wish to exploit an interest or resource and they must work together to achieve this.

When are they Inappropriate ?

Compromising	Avoiding	Dominating	Obliging	Integrating
The parties are not on an equal footing	The outcome of the conflict and its subject is important to you	Issue is complex	The subject of the conflict is not important to you	The conflict is not very complex
The conflict is complex	You are the key decision maker	Both parties are equally powerful	Your position is strong	Time is of the essence
Both parties need to problem solve	A decision is required	Subordinates are competent and their relationship with you is important	The other party has a weak position or has acted in an untrustworthy manner	The outcome matters to several stakeholders
	You need to act quickly	There is no reason to rush		Future relationship is not relevant i.e. it’s about one transaction

Each conflict is unique. There is no one way of resolving it and you may even need to combine approaches as the conflict develops. Careful consideration of the factors above will help you to understand what the best approach is.

This is where your emotions may sabotage you! It’s easy to take a default approach to any conflict. Some may use aggression when feeling angry, others may avoid any kind of confrontation, no matter how important it is to them. That’s when conflict resolution becomes dysfunctional.

Be honest with yourself and understand your default approach to conflict. Once you become aware of it, you can start to become more flexible and courageous in resolving conflict constructively.

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[1] M. Afzalur Rahim, Managing Conflict in Organizations (4^th edn., 2011, Routledge)